What does the world want from us? Are we supposed to react as the emotionally complex beings that we are, or are we expected to act just like everyone else?
Consider Hamlet.
Is he crazy? Is love the major force behind all of his actions? Isn't there always a kind of love behind revenge?
Hero or villan?
Tuesday, March 4, 2014
Writing Prompt #2 - Don't Tell Me How to Feel
Write about a time when someone told you that your emotions were inappropriate (think about Hamlet and his "inky cloak" response). What was the situation and how did you react? Does anyone ever have the right to tell people how they should feel?
I think you should be Abel to tell someone how you feel, because if you never have right to be mad at them for hurting you chances are they didn't even know.
My mom don't let me go anywhere without either of my brothers going with me; even though one of my brother is always going somewhere and my other brother barely come out of his room. Then when I have plans, she says no and when I bring up how she let my oldest brother go anywhere he wants, she say that my attitude is not right; and this isn't the time to say that crap to her. Plus, I don't think it's right to tell anyone how they should feel, because what you experience might not, and/or never, be the same as the other person.
my mom alway tell me I am to emotional my the kids stole my gum and i got mad . when she told me I was over reacting.I couldn't yell because she would have hurt me but I felt I have no private area for my self and i cant trust kids.she cant tell me how to fell because she is not in my shoes
Like, I'm never home so that means my brother's and little sister chooses to be in my room. Yay. I come home from practice tired as ever and I see that my older brother left his cloths in my room. Like dude this is not your room, why is your stuff in here? So i started yelling "WHY DO PEOPLE COME IN MY ROOM WHEN I'M NOT HOME?". My mom tells me I'm over reacting and that I have a bad attitude, but if it was the other way around she'd feel the same way.
I like the capital letters. And that's exactly what I'm talking about; I don't think people really take the time to put themselves in another person's shoes.
I get annoyed and mad when my brother uses my car because he doesn't pay for the gas. My mom tells me to not be mad because she will give me some money which calms me down. I don't think anyone should be told how to feel unless those feelings are causing the person to harm others. For example, if a person's hatred leads them to murder someone they should be told that they their hatred is wrong because it caused them to kill someone.
Intriguing comment. Clearly you have not murdered your brother. Is it just one person's perspective that decides if the feelings are hurting someone else? I mean, obviously those feelings exist for a reason, so aren't they justifiable? I keep thinking of poor Hamlet. You'll see...
I get upset that people don't understand what I mean when I am explaining things. My parents tell me that I cant get angry because its not okay. It just makes me more upset. No one can tell me what/how to feel because they are my emotions, and just like everyone else you have a right to feel that way.
I get really mad and sad when i get yelled at. If I get yelled at or if someone say no to me i will cry and and sit there quite. My mom tells me that im being petty and im always not going to get my why.
a day somebody told me that was a time when my brother wasn't there for me and i told him about something that bother me and he started saying bad stuff. my reaction was shocking. No, nobody should tell you what should be your emotions because it can change the person.
Last Nov, Dec was a struggle for me. So as you can see, I participated in the Hmong American Pageant 2013-2014. I didn't really want to join, but my mom and sister wanted me to go for it. I told them It's not me. I'm not like type to be on stage alone. My mom and sister didn't care what I thought. They said that it'll be a good opportunity for me. I still said no. Then they started to bring up my pass and say that I'm a bad daughter. I then decided to join the pageant just for them, since I was a good daughter/sister. I didn't want to hurt my mom and sister's feelings. I didn't care how I felt anymore. I tried it my way but it didn't work out. No one should tell you what to do, unless you're like me.. Too nice and too caring for what others think.
PS, I didn't regret joining. Afterward I notice that Pageant made me a better person. I was able to meet such wonderful people in my life. I took 2nd place and made my parents proud of me. :)
Personally, I can't think of a time when I've been told my feelings were inappropriate, but I do know that if I was ever placed in that situation, I would be very irritated.
I don't believe people have the right to tell others how they should feel nor do they have the right to judge another person's feelings because every individual perceives the events that happen around them differently. Even if the other person states that s/he has gone through what you have, no two situations are experienced in the exact same way, so no one should be saying anything about anyone else's feelings but their own.
I have a deep hatred for a single person that has been in my life, i will not disclose who this person is. I have been told many times by various people that I should not be angry at them at all and that is just a waste of energy. But I will never stop hating this person, and I always feel misunderstood when I tell people why I hate this person so. I think that it is okay sometimes when to tell a person how to feel, but if they choose not to listen, then do not push the matter. Thy will feel how they wish to feel, and very little will change that. -A.J. Croft
I'm a very open type of person I can and will talk about anything that comes up but time and time again my family will tell my oldest brother and I that our conversation at the dinner table is too inappropriate while we eat. At times it is okay to tell people their stepping out of line but don't judge them about it. Sometimes the timing and place just isn't the right setting for those actions to be put into place. ~Miranda H
On my 7th birthday my oldest brother bought me a set of my favorite model cars. Then 8 years later some little kids broke my most favorite car. I asked my second oldest brother how it happened since I wasn't there. He said he gave that one to a little kid to play with. I was so angry I started to yell at him because that car had sentimental value since I don't see my oldest brother anymore. My parents heard the yelling and told me to get over it stop yelling at my brother. I think that no one should tell another how to feel. I also think though that one should be able to control their emotions and not over react.
This happens every time with my younger brother, Kevin, and I a lot when we argue. Whenever we argue about something, my dad jumps in and starts telling me that I'm the wrong one, and I'm just like what the hell? -.- I'm the second oldest of the children so I know when I'm right and when I'm wrong, but as soon as I argue with Kevin, my dad always tells me to just be calm and walk away. But how can I when I want my little brother to change to become a better person? In my opinion, everyone has told someone to get over a person or forget about something, but they have no control over that person's life. It's up to that person to control their emotion and their life so just let it be.
Well my when I try to vent out to my mom she laughs at my face and tells me straight up that I am over reacting. She even threatens me when I cry, she tells me that only the weak cry. It gets extremely frustrating, even more when she contradicts her seemingly good intentions. I honestly think that there is a time and place for everything. Sometimes people need a kick back into reality and away from their emotions. It all comes down to the situation, it really depends. Though all in all, we are all human, we have impulses, on both ends.
No one has the right to tell someone how they feel. We don't always have the choice on how we feel. Emotions and feelings come to us in many ways and it is how we react to those emotions that decide whether or not those emotions are good or frowned upon
My family tells me all the time that I over react emotionally about things. They don't see the world around them as I see it around myself, which makes it even harder for them to understand. It's not ok to tell people how to act or feel especially when they have no idea what's going on. In my situations I just try not to say anything anymore when something is bothering me because of people that do tell me that. That only makes things worse, but at least they're happy.
My sister is a US National Guard soldier. I was talking to her on Skype and I cried because I missed her a lot, and my mom was yelling at me that I shouldn't be crying because it's not that big of a deal. It's a waste of tears, it's not like she's going to die. My mom doesn't understand that I only have 1 sister that is very close to me.
i don't think anyone should tell someone there emotional because i honestly think everyone should let out there feeling and emotions. A time when i felt emotional is when i seen my mom hurting and my brother told me to stop being so emotional but i hate to see people hurt or crying. (sammie)
Me and my mom is super close, but I am a really emotional person. So when we do fight I start crying. I also cry about the littlest things sometimes and than my mom gets mad. She always like I can't believe you are that upset about something so little. Which makes me even more mad or upset. -Samantha Mikulak
I get really mad when my brothers make annoying noises. When I yell at them because they are being too loud, I get yelled at for talking too loud. After that I just kept quiet. I was lowkey pissed that she yelled at me. I feel that people shouldn't tell other people how they should feel.
When My Dad Complains To Me About My Dogs I Get Mad And He Thinks The Way Im Acting Is Not good because he doesnt have the connection i have with my dogs and dnt know how much they mean to me so he thinks my emotion is inappropriate. People dnt have the right to tell someone how they should feel because they dnt know what the person is going through or feel the way that person feels .
Last weekend my uncle passed away. During this time I cried the most and refused to talk to anyone. My mom thought my actions and solitude was inappropriate. My family said he was in a better place but I wasn't ready to accept that. I personally think no one has the right to tell someone how to feel because each person copes with situations differently and that should be respected.
my mom always gets on me when i get mad and yell at my lil nieces even when i start off asking them to stop what there doing nicely 3 times. my mom says i should have more patience
My grandpa death hit me hard, all my family told me to get over because he's gone now. There's nothing that can be done. I believe people should tell you, so it helps you snap back to reality and not to dwell on the past.
I think everyone is entitled to their emotions and no one should tell someone how they should feel. We could change our emotions but most likely it won't happen.
In some situations us as people do over exaggerate, how ever i don't think anyone can tell someone how to feel. We are human, NO ONE IS PERFECT! But this happens often between me and my mom, specially when its about money issues. Every time she stressing and frustrated at what ever it is that happen to her that day will some how become my problems at the end of the day. So she comes home after her long days of grinding out for her kids, and needs someone to vent to. So of course the oldest has the open ear, however it always turns to some type of unnecessary argument. I always try to get out of the situation respectfully, but apparently me being calm while she's yelling is always disrespectful. Which leads to me being what ever she can think of at the time. "Gotta love the moms tho, no matta"
I don't think I have ever been told that my emotions were inappropriate. There has been times where people can misread my emotions for something there not. Like sometimes I just don't feel like talking but people mistake that for something being wrong or I'm upset about something.
My grandma tells me all the time that Im overreacting. I tell her all the time when Im stressing about school and getting ready for college but she always insists that Im exaggerating. Saying that I havent even entered the "real world" yet. Sometimes I may over exaggerate but I dont like to believe it.
When my grandpa died 3 years ago it messed with my attitude and I was a snappy person and I would explode at anyone that would try to help. I don't think someone can tell you how to feel, mentally and emotionally some people take things differently and react differently
Alright people. Lots of great answers here; you can kinda feel for Hamlet, surrounded as he is by a bunch of people telling him to stop being such a baby. End of posting for this round.
Often during football games you get caught up in your emotions. There were a couple of times where we were losing and you'd get so angry and irritated . And the coaches would tell me it wasn't the right time to do this.
I think everyone has those moments, and everyone should not be told how to feel but can take some advice from other people
Yesssss, my mother tells me all the time how I should feel about things. BIG & SMALL! Like coming from work a guy says he'll get his sister on me for no reason (because he was mad) while I'm still on working grounds. I'm the type of person who's like oh OK. I don't care! My mom would get mad trying to tell me I should feel so and so way and blah blah blah, but when I really don't care she'll then try and force me to feel some type of way.... does It Work? Aha. No! Maybe sometimes , but I like making my own choices I'm just that type of gal!! :)
my mom and step dad are usually ones to tell me how to feel. i and i am really never able to voice my own opinion unless i am agreeing with them. so instead of being a good kid and agreeing i just argue my point across because even if i am right, they continuously argue that i am not right . like the quote "its my way or the highway". they think that since theyre older then me, that they can cuss me out and i have to stay quiet .my parents always try and tell me I need to feel some type of way about how i talk to them but i dont think I'm disrespectful,theyre just strict ....- ASIA DIVINE
My dad would always try to control how I felt about things since as he grew up, his dad was always strict on him. For example if I felt bad for a stray dog/cat he's tell me to not care for them because they are just animals and not humans, or if I was ever down about something he'd tell me to man up.
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ReplyDeleteI think you should be Abel to tell someone how you feel, because if you never have right to be mad at them for hurting you chances are they didn't even know.
ReplyDeleteMy mom don't let me go anywhere without either of my brothers going with me; even though one of my brother is always going somewhere and my other brother barely come out of his room. Then when I have plans, she says no and when I bring up how she let my oldest brother go anywhere he wants, she say that my attitude is not right; and this isn't the time to say that crap to her.
ReplyDeletePlus, I don't think it's right to tell anyone how they should feel, because what you experience might not, and/or never, be the same as the other person.
nice.
ReplyDeletemy mom alway tell me I am to emotional my the kids stole my gum and i got mad . when she told me I was over reacting.I couldn't yell because she would have hurt me but I felt I have no private area for my self and i cant trust kids.she cant tell me how to fell because she is not in my shoes
ReplyDeleteLike, I'm never home so that means my brother's and little sister chooses to be in my room. Yay. I come home from practice tired as ever and I see that my older brother left his cloths in my room. Like dude this is not your room, why is your stuff in here? So i started yelling "WHY DO PEOPLE COME IN MY ROOM WHEN I'M NOT HOME?". My mom tells me I'm over reacting and that I have a bad attitude, but if it was the other way around she'd feel the same way.
ReplyDeleteI like the capital letters. And that's exactly what I'm talking about; I don't think people really take the time to put themselves in another person's shoes.
DeleteI get annoyed and mad when my brother uses my car because he doesn't pay for the gas. My mom tells me to not be mad because she will give me some money which calms me down. I don't think anyone should be told how to feel unless those feelings are causing the person to harm others. For example, if a person's hatred leads them to murder someone they should be told that they their hatred is wrong because it caused them to kill someone.
ReplyDeleteIntriguing comment. Clearly you have not murdered your brother. Is it just one person's perspective that decides if the feelings are hurting someone else? I mean, obviously those feelings exist for a reason, so aren't they justifiable? I keep thinking of poor Hamlet. You'll see...
DeleteI get upset that people don't understand what I mean when I am explaining things. My parents tell me that I cant get angry because its not okay. It just makes me more upset. No one can tell me what/how to feel because they are my emotions, and just like everyone else you have a right to feel that way.
ReplyDeleteI get really mad and sad when i get yelled at. If I get yelled at or if someone say no to me i will cry and and sit there quite. My mom tells me that im being petty and im always not going to get my why.
ReplyDeletea day somebody told me that was a time when my brother wasn't there for me and i told him about something that bother me and he started saying bad stuff. my reaction was shocking. No, nobody should tell you what should be your emotions because it can change the person.
ReplyDeleteLast Nov, Dec was a struggle for me. So as you can see, I participated in the Hmong American Pageant 2013-2014. I didn't really want to join, but my mom and sister wanted me to go for it. I told them It's not me. I'm not like type to be on stage alone. My mom and sister didn't care what I thought. They said that it'll be a good opportunity for me. I still said no. Then they started to bring up my pass and say that I'm a bad daughter. I then decided to join the pageant just for them, since I was a good daughter/sister. I didn't want to hurt my mom and sister's feelings. I didn't care how I felt anymore. I tried it my way but it didn't work out. No one should tell you what to do, unless you're like me.. Too nice and too caring for what others think.
ReplyDeletePS, I didn't regret joining. Afterward I notice that Pageant made me a better person. I was able to meet such wonderful people in my life. I took 2nd place and made my parents proud of me. :)
-Mailai Xiong 6th period xD
That's a good story.
DeletePersonally, I can't think of a time when I've been told my feelings were inappropriate, but I do know that if I was ever placed in that situation, I would be very irritated.
ReplyDeleteI don't believe people have the right to tell others how they should feel nor do they have the right to judge another person's feelings because every individual perceives the events that happen around them differently. Even if the other person states that s/he has gone through what you have, no two situations are experienced in the exact same way, so no one should be saying anything about anyone else's feelings but their own.
So true. Thank you.
DeleteI have a deep hatred for a single person that has been in my life, i will not disclose who this person is. I have been told many times by various people that I should not be angry at them at all and that is just a waste of energy. But I will never stop hating this person, and I always feel misunderstood when I tell people why I hate this person so.
ReplyDeleteI think that it is okay sometimes when to tell a person how to feel, but if they choose not to listen, then do not push the matter. Thy will feel how they wish to feel, and very little will change that.
-A.J. Croft
I'm a very open type of person I can and will talk about anything that comes up but time and time again my family will tell my oldest brother and I that our conversation at the dinner table is too inappropriate while we eat.
ReplyDeleteAt times it is okay to tell people their stepping out of line but don't judge them about it. Sometimes the timing and place just isn't the right setting for those actions to be put into place.
~Miranda H
Yes! Totally agree.
DeleteOn my 7th birthday my oldest brother bought me a set of my favorite model cars. Then 8 years later some little kids broke my most favorite car. I asked my second oldest brother how it happened since I wasn't there. He said he gave that one to a little kid to play with. I was so angry I started to yell at him because that car had sentimental value since I don't see my oldest brother anymore. My parents heard the yelling and told me to get over it stop yelling at my brother.
ReplyDeleteI think that no one should tell another how to feel. I also think though that one should be able to control their emotions and not over react.
This happens every time with my younger brother, Kevin, and I a lot when we argue. Whenever we argue about something, my dad jumps in and starts telling me that I'm the wrong one, and I'm just like what the hell? -.- I'm the second oldest of the children so I know when I'm right and when I'm wrong, but as soon as I argue with Kevin, my dad always tells me to just be calm and walk away. But how can I when I want my little brother to change to become a better person? In my opinion, everyone has told someone to get over a person or forget about something, but they have no control over that person's life. It's up to that person to control their emotion and their life so just let it be.
ReplyDeleteWell my when I try to vent out to my mom she laughs at my face and tells me straight up that I am over reacting. She even threatens me when I cry, she tells me that only the weak cry. It gets extremely frustrating, even more when she contradicts her seemingly good intentions. I honestly think that there is a time and place for everything. Sometimes people need a kick back into reality and away from their emotions. It all comes down to the situation, it really depends. Though all in all, we are all human, we have impulses, on both ends.
ReplyDeleteNo one has the right to tell someone how they feel. We don't always have the choice on how we feel. Emotions and feelings come to us in many ways and it is how we react to those emotions that decide whether or not those emotions are good or frowned upon
ReplyDeleteInteresting. Aren't you in charge of your emotions? I mean, no one can make you feel anything - right?
DeleteMy family tells me all the time that I over react emotionally about things. They don't see the world around them as I see it around myself, which makes it even harder for them to understand. It's not ok to tell people how to act or feel especially when they have no idea what's going on. In my situations I just try not to say anything anymore when something is bothering me because of people that do tell me that. That only makes things worse, but at least they're happy.
ReplyDeleteMy sister is a US National Guard soldier. I was talking to her on Skype and I cried because I missed her a lot, and my mom was yelling at me that I shouldn't be crying because it's not that big of a deal. It's a waste of tears, it's not like she's going to die. My mom doesn't understand that I only have 1 sister that is very close to me.
ReplyDeleteOh, wow, powerful. You're mom is being really brave, no? This is powerful and short.
Deletei don't think anyone should tell someone there emotional because i honestly think everyone should let out there feeling and emotions. A time when i felt emotional is when i seen my mom hurting and my brother told me to stop being so emotional but i hate to see people hurt or crying. (sammie)
ReplyDeleteMe and my mom is super close, but I am a really emotional person. So when we do fight I start crying. I also cry about the littlest things sometimes and than my mom gets mad. She always like I can't believe you are that upset about something so little. Which makes me even more mad or upset. -Samantha Mikulak
ReplyDeleteI get really mad when my brothers make annoying noises. When I yell at them because they are being too loud, I get yelled at for talking too loud. After that I just kept quiet. I was lowkey pissed that she yelled at me. I feel that people shouldn't tell other people how they should feel.
ReplyDeleteWhen My Dad Complains To Me About My Dogs I Get Mad And He Thinks The Way Im Acting Is Not good because he doesnt have the connection i have with my dogs and dnt know how much they mean to me so he thinks my emotion is inappropriate. People dnt have the right to tell someone how they should feel because they dnt know what the person is going through or feel the way that person feels .
ReplyDeleteLast weekend my uncle passed away. During this time I cried the most and refused to talk to anyone. My mom thought my actions and solitude was inappropriate. My family said he was in a better place but I wasn't ready to accept that. I personally think no one has the right to tell someone how to feel because each person copes with situations differently and that should be respected.
ReplyDeletemy mom always gets on me when i get mad
ReplyDeleteand yell at my lil nieces even when i start off asking them to stop what there doing nicely 3 times. my mom says i should have more patience
My grandpa death hit me hard, all my family told me to get over because he's gone now. There's nothing that can be done. I believe people should tell you, so it helps you snap back to reality and not to dwell on the past.
ReplyDeleteI think everyone is entitled to their emotions and no one should tell someone how they should feel. We could change our emotions but most likely it won't happen.
ReplyDeleteIn some situations us as people do over exaggerate, how ever i don't think anyone can tell someone how to feel. We are human, NO ONE IS PERFECT!
ReplyDeleteBut this happens often between me and my mom, specially when its about money issues. Every time she stressing and frustrated at what ever it is that happen to her that day will some how become my problems at the end of the day. So she comes home after her long days of grinding out for her kids, and needs someone to vent to. So of course the oldest has the open ear, however it always turns to some type of unnecessary argument. I always try to get out of the situation respectfully, but apparently me being calm while she's yelling is always disrespectful. Which leads to me being what ever she can think of at the time.
"Gotta love the moms tho, no matta"
I don't think I have ever been told that my emotions were inappropriate. There has been times where people can misread my emotions for something there not. Like sometimes I just don't feel like talking but people mistake that for something being wrong or I'm upset about something.
ReplyDeleteMy grandma tells me all the time that Im overreacting. I tell her all the time when Im stressing about school and getting ready for college but she always insists that Im exaggerating. Saying that I havent even entered the "real world" yet. Sometimes I may over exaggerate but I dont like to believe it.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
DeleteWhen my grandpa died 3 years ago it messed with my attitude and I was a snappy person and I would explode at anyone that would try to help. I don't think someone can tell you how to feel, mentally and emotionally some people take things differently and react differently
ReplyDeleteAlright people. Lots of great answers here; you can kinda feel for Hamlet, surrounded as he is by a bunch of people telling him to stop being such a baby. End of posting for this round.
ReplyDeleteOften during football games you get caught up in your emotions. There were a couple of times where we were losing and you'd get so angry and irritated . And the coaches would tell me it wasn't the right time to do this.
ReplyDeleteI think everyone has those moments, and everyone should not be told how to feel but can take some advice from other people
Yesssss, my mother tells me all the time how I should feel about things. BIG & SMALL! Like coming from work a guy says he'll get his sister on me for no reason (because he was mad) while I'm still on working grounds. I'm the type of person who's like oh OK. I don't care! My mom would get mad trying to tell me I should feel so and so way and blah blah blah, but when I really don't care she'll then try and force me to feel some type of way.... does It Work? Aha. No! Maybe sometimes , but I like making my own choices I'm just that type of gal!! :)
ReplyDeletemy mom and step dad are usually ones to tell me how to feel. i and i am really never able to voice my own opinion unless i am agreeing with them. so instead of being a good kid and agreeing i just argue my point across because even if i am right, they continuously argue that i am not right . like the quote "its my way or the highway". they think that since theyre older then me, that they can cuss me out and i have to stay quiet .my parents always try and tell me I need to feel some type of way about how i talk to them but i dont think I'm disrespectful,theyre just strict ....- ASIA DIVINE
ReplyDeleteMy dad would always try to control how I felt about things since as he grew up, his dad was always strict on him. For example if I felt bad for a stray dog/cat he's tell me to not care for them because they are just animals and not humans, or if I was ever down about something he'd tell me to man up.
ReplyDelete